Conversation with a Cookie.

Rachel Irving

Boring. You are the most boring and predictable little girl in the whole entire world. The most boring girl ever. Predictable and obvious. I bet all your friends call you Obvious Ollie.

My name is not Ollie.

It should be, oh yes, or Boring Bertha.

Stop talking now. You’re food. It is time to get eaten.

You see that's my point exactly only a truly boring individual, when confronted with a cookie, a lively conversational cookie, such as myself, would go straight for the eating option.

I was thinking, I'm just imagining this conversation.

Trust me. You aren’t, this is real.

If I don't eat you because of something I'm imagining, one of my sisters will definitely eat you instead.

You think so?

Do you need to ask? Cookie, you obviously don’t have sisters.

That’s true, no sisters, no loving mother or father. I’m all alone in the world, a forlorn, orphaned cookie.

What! First you start by insulting me and now you’re trying to make me feel sorry for you. If you did have sisters you’d be in crumbs by now. Bye-bye Cookie.

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